Change, Health, Money

Is life balance possible?

March 12, 2017
Is life balance possible?

We hear the words life balance, know we should be trying to achieve it, but never getting there.

Knowing already that we; eat too much, don’t exercise enough, drink too much, work too much, spend too much and so on, keeps us in an endless cycle of guilt.

We all deserve pleasure in life. But maybe not in the ways we think.

When we try giving up the things that give us pleasure; the alcohol, the food, the shopping. We suffer, because these things provide relief from the drudgery of life. They’re the few comforts we have, so we deserve them right?

We all deserve pleasure and joy in life, but maybe not in the ways we think. Not in ways that leave us financially, physically or mentally worse off.

How do you unwind everything?

Being told that overspending, overeating or over-indulging in anything is wrong, only fuels guilt.

We’ve spent a life-time making choices and actions that got us to this point. To change our current life circumstances we need to start unwinding some of these.

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step

Unwinding means seeking different choices and actions to the past. An education and a re-learning is required.

3 things are needed to start the process:


we have to want to change, believing that it will be for the better


be open to new ideas and possibilities


unwinding takes time; days, weeks, months and sometimes years.

We only get one life, so isn’t it worth finding ways to make it better?

Change doesn’t happen overnight

I’m not a psychologist. My thoughts and opinions are based on personal experience and years of deep thinking, trial and error.

You have to want to change and then look for the answers.

The mind or mental state needs to be healed before any life change can occur.

I can’t tell you to drop your ego, get over yourself and stop spending money on crap. It’s no different to telling an alcoholic to just stop drinking. It won’t work.

You have to want to change. And then you need to look for the answers.

Do you really want to change?

Many people don’t want to change. They say they want to, talk about how they could and then do nothing. They find security in the insecurity of their current life status.

Change is scary. Or maybe it’s just too hard. And what will other people think? Will it change my identity? Will it look like I’m bowing out of life, turning into a loser?

The key to happiness is getting the mind and body in balance.

Does it matter what anyone else thinks? As long as you’re doing what’s best for you and not harming anyone in the process.

The key to happiness is getting the mind and body in balance. Then nothing else matters. We’ll no longer need or desire the things we once did. No more alcohol, recreational drugs, shopping and junk food to ease the soul. We’ll already be at ease.

People’s behaviour and everyday choices are driven by their state of mind. You balance the mind (and body) and everything will fall into place.

Sounds too good to be true?

No. Not if you believe your life can be better.

Imagine being able to reduce or even eliminate our ego? No longer being bothered by how we perceive others and how we think they perceive us. Because none of this matters. All that matters is discovering and doing the things that bring you joy.

Just another self-help guru?

No. I don’t proclaim to have all the answers. I write about my experiences, of which others may learn from and choose to follow if something resonates with them.

Having spent years never feeling fulfilled, I still felt there was something missing (though externally there wasn’t). So I searched for answers.

An extreme low point struck 7 years ago when severe anxiety took hold. Having always been a chronic worrier and over-thinker, the anxiety quietly gathered momentum. Then it reached a debilitating point.

And yes, she could fix me. It would take about 3 months.

The next few months were spent desperately searching for a cure. Something to make the hurt stop (anxiety makes your body ache constantly). Somehow getting through each day; going to work, looking after young children and surviving on 1-2 hours sleep a night.

The reality of taking anti-anxiety medication seemed like a no-going-back situation. So I continued the search for an alternative solution.

Whilst driving home from work one day, I came across a sign for a local TCM (Traditional Chinese Medicine) clinic. Although sceptical, I was fast running out of options.

With her broken English, Dr Maria Ke Pan explained that my body was “out of balance” and in particular energy blockages in the Heart area (not the same as blocked arteries). And yes, she could fix me. It would take about 3 months.

Treatment was the consumption of plant based herbs (not animal based; a common myth with TCM).

Within a few weeks my body stopped aching. In the early stages of treatment Maria said I would eventually feel a personality change and she was right.

Within 4 months I felt like a different person, better than I’d ever felt. I didn’t think I would feel normal again and now I felt better than normal.  I was calm, relaxed, sleeping normally, not overthinking anymore and my confidence had returned.

Everything was back in balance. Maria had fixed me. I couldn’t have felt happier and I’ve never looked back.

Choosing that particular path to recovery was the right decision. Had I chosen a different path, the outcome would have been entirely different – and not for the better.

In Western terms I had a mental health problem. A problem of the brain, which is treated with cognitive therapy and prescription medicines, designed to re-wire the brain.

In Eastern terms (TCM) I had an imbalance  in the “whole” body (not just the brain). And when you fix energy blockages in the whole body, you fix the whole body (including the brain).

Yes it works.

I’ll talk more about Traditional Chinese Medicine in future blogs. It’s a very powerful healer, that anyone can benefit from. And being 2500 years old, there must be some logic and truth behind it.

Meanwhile, Google it, learn more about it.

I welcome your views and feedback.

Keep looking at everything Differently.


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Encouraging people to make choices that work for them as individuals, rather than following everyone else. Helping people help themselves.

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